Humorous Wedding Speech from the Father of the Bride -- Wedding Toasts

Humorous Wedding Speech from the Father of the Bride Well, expert afternoon everyone, for those of you that don?t experience me my name is Lee and I?m Janie?s dad, and in keeping with tradition, it is my honor and privilege to support the ?Father of the Bride Speech?. Having to make this speech is one of the few opportunities in a married man?s life when he is allowed to do all of the talking...and I intend to make the most of it. Now, giving a speech can be a little stressful so I will put into practice what I preach, that is...always remember the rudiment to the XYZ of public speaking. ABC..Always Be Confident, ?XYZ..Xamine Your Zipper. (check zipper). It won?t be a big speech on account of my throat?.no, it?s not sore, it?s just that Janet threatened to cut it if I go on in like manner longSo I?ll seize on...Distinguished guests, those of dubious distinction and those of absolutely no distinction whatsoever, family, relatives, friends, relatives of friends, friends of frien ds, hotel staff, freeloaders and hangers-on, on behalf of Janet and myself, I extend a warm take to Janie and Martin?s wedding celebration reception. You know, delivering the ?Father of the Bride? speech feels a subprogram like a sheikh walking into his harem for the first time...you know what to do, but you don?t know where to start. I will start however by taking this opportunity to thank especially Janet for not only being chief worrier and organise... ... we marry. It is very obvious that they founder found in one another a perfect rival their happiness shines like a beacon. Janie and Martin, there is no challenge in a marriage that cannot be overcome by the following triad, three word sentences I was wrong. You were right. I love you.So, approaching the toast, ladies and gentlemen, please patronage and make sure your glasses are fully charged?mine is being charged to Barclaycard?Janie and Martin? present?s to the past for all that it taught youHere?s to the present for a ll that you shareAnd here?s to the future day for all that you can look forward togetherLadies & gentlemen please rhytidoplasty your glasses. The toast is?Janie & Martin, Bride and Groom